The Art of Receiving: Alchemy, Reciprocity & the Give and Take of Life

Most of us were taught that giving is an expectation that shows good morals. Far fewer of us were taught how to receive. We deflect compliments, refuse help, say "oh, I'm good," and quietly believe that taking is an inconvenience onto others/selfish. Even worse, if you have found yourself in a position where others around you abide by this code of conduct the self guilt can be compounded. Yet every ancient wisdom tradition, alchemy included, teaches that receiving is not just the opposite of giving. It is the other half of a process for balance to occur ☯️.

The Alchemist's Vessel: Why Receiving Is Imperative

Every alchemist begins with a vessel…… Okay, okay, okay, I'll try to keep this simple, and I won't get tooooo deep, but this needs explaining……

The Vas Hermeticum, or Hermetic Vessel, is one of alchemy’s necessary concepts for facilitating cultivated change in conscious evolution. It is a sealed, sacred container in which opposing forces are held together long enough for transformation to occur. Which is your physical body.

Imagine yourself as that vessel. When you give without allowing yourself to receive, you lose an opportunity for spiritual progression. The magic happens when you allow both poles￫ giving and receiving, in either direction￫ to move through the experience. Then, from that framework, the move forward offers no or less resistance or pull from either side.

This is the process of transformation within yourself, where opposites can meet, integrate, and become something greater than either was on its own. This beautifully echoes the Corpus Hermeticum, which explores spiritual rebirth (kind of levelling up) and the journey toward recognizing unity beneath the many forms of polarities within a lifetime.

No-thing can be singularly utilized to achieve balance. It's almost like the trickster of Spirit designed a “clause” that states bringing “stuff” together will integrate oneself to wholeness. So, be brave and reach out to others, whatever that looks like. Even though chillaxing in bed, watching tarot readers, and eating quasi-expensive chocolate might be a better plan. Or do both! 👈

Also, if there were nowhere for that “morphing” to take place, it could not happen. That's why it is truly a blessing to be incarnated. The same is true in our pursuit of mastery. We can't be nourished by love, support, abundance, or wisdom if our vessel is closed, cracked, or already full of old stories.

Both Sides: Giving and Receiving as Partners

Alchemical endeavours have many faces: Sun and Moon, King and Queen, Sulphur and Mercury. One is outward, active, and giving. The other is inward, receptive, and reflective. Neither is better. The work is complete only when the two unite in what alchemists called the coniunctio, the sacred union.

This is the push and pull we feel inside. Part of us wants to reach out, act, give, and do. Part of us longs to rest, soften, be held, and take in.

When we over-honour the solar side, we burn out, overgive, and project what we think others need without listening. When we over-honour the lunar side, we can stagnate, feel powerless, or become sad and resentful if others do not accept our efforts.

Balance is a dance between the two throughout this existence, not a goal we reach and stay.

The good news is that once balance is reached, it becomes a song that stays in the background forever guiding us through future opportunities to balance out.

The Ouroboros: Life as a Circle of Exchange

The ouroboros, the serpent eating its own tail, is one of alchemy's oldest symbols. It shows a closed circle where what goes out returns, and what returns goes out again. Nothing is forced, and nothing flows in one direction forever.

That's reciprocity in its simplest depiction. When we try to live in a straight line, only giving or only taking, we break the circle, and our energy, relationships, and health begin to take a toll. Everything is connected and has a natural flow of reason.

Becoming aware of this flow through feeling it is half the battle. The other half is allowing oneself to receive.

Signs Your Give and Take Is Out of Balance

Your body and emotions are good messengers. Your give and take may be out of balance if you notice:

• You feel uncomfortable or guilty when someone does something kind for you (what do they want from me)

• You say "I'm fine" automatically, even when you aren't (and don't want to spill the beans)

• You are always the helper, listener or fixer, and rarely the one supported

• You feel resentful or tired but can't say why

• You attract or stay with people who take more than they give, or you find yourself taking too much without noticing

• You give away anything, even when purging items and assume others would like them

• You struggle to rest, or feel you must earn your downtime

• You take up someone's time without being mindful that you might be repeating yourself or feeling the need to be heard

  
  

These are not flaws. They are simply ways our emotional body gives us a que to start transmuting something that might be out of wack.

Why Blocked Receiving Often Starts With Old Emotional Patterns

Many of us learned early that love had to be earned, that needing things could create a burden, or that being strong meant needing nothing. Those beliefs shape how we respond when life tries to give to us in abundant ways.

This is where alchemy's solve et coagula (dissolve and bring together) is helpful. We recognize and take aligned steps to release the old pattern (I am oversimplifying here; this is a major embarkation), then rebuild a new, sturdy internal foundation￫ one that allows in support, abundance, and care.

Preparing to receive by clearing out stagnant beliefs, even those located in the subconscious mind, gets us to the root of the distortion, such as I don't deserve this, I have to earn it, or I'll owe something if I accept.

Receiving is a skill, and like any skill, it can be formed.

As you become more comfortable receiving, your giving changes too! It becomes freer, less depleted, and more genuine because it flows from fullness rather than obligation.

Final Thoughts

Okay, so what's the practicality in all of this? Ultimately, when you notice how energy flows within you and around you, you become more comfortable being you, whether you are afflicted with the trait of over-giving or being stingy. Either one creates karma that will eventually need to be moved through.

Healers, on some level, empaths, and way-showers are those who go through this struggle at some point in their journey. It is a rite of passage🤷‍♂️. Once balance has been achieved, we walk forward free of expectation, greed, and insecurity. We are allowed to give freely without feeling sacrifice, and we value the opportunity for either polarity as it crosses our path. Receiving is a present to ourselves!!! 💝

Where in your life are you being invited to acknowledge reciprocity a little more?

If you'd like support releasing old patterns around worthiness and receiving through hypnosis, channeling, or Reiki, I'd be honoured to work with you. Connect with me at contact@angelasolorzano.com.

This post is for educational and inspirational purposes and is not a substitute for professional medical or mental health care.